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Act 1, Scene 1
Original Text
Modern Text
Enter ORLANDO and ADAM
ORLANDO and ADAM enter.
ORLANDO
As I remember, Adam, it was upon this fashion bequeathed me by will but poor a thousand crowns, and, as thou sayest, charged my brother on his blessing to breed me well. And there begins my sadness. My brother Jaques he keeps at school, and report speaks goldenly of his profit. For my part, he keeps me rustically at home or, to speak more properly, stays me here at home unkept; for call you that “keeping” for a gentleman of my birth that differs not from the stalling of an ox? His horses are bred better, for, besides that they are fair with their feeding, they are taught their manage and, to that end, riders dearly hired. But I, his brother, gain nothing under him but growth, for the which his animals on his dunghills are as much bound to him as I. Besides this nothing that he so plentifully gives me, the something that nature gave me his countenance seems to take from me. He lets me feed with his hinds, bars me the place of a brother, and, as much as in him lies, mines my gentility with my education. This is it, Adam, that grieves me, and the spirit of my father, which I think is within me, begins to mutiny against this servitude. I will no longer endure it, though yet I know no wise remedy how to avoid it.
ORLANDO
I remember, Adam, that’s exactly why my father only left me a thousand crowns in his will. And as you know, my father commanded my brother, Oliver, to make sure that I was brought up well—and that’s where my sadness begins. Oliver keeps my brother Jaques away at school, and everyone says he’s doing extremely well there. But he keeps me at home in the country—to be precise, he keeps me stuck at home but doesn’t support me. I ask you, is this any way to treat a gentleman as nobly born as I am, to pen me in like an ox? His horses get treated better than I do—at least he feeds them and trains them properly, and spends a lot of money on trainers for them. All I’ve gained from his care is weight, which makes me as indebted to him as his animals on the manure pile are. He gives me plenty of nothing, and takes away everything else, letting me eat with his servants, refusing me what’s owed me as his brother, and ruining my good birth with a poor education. This is what angers me, Adam. My father’s temper and spirit, which I think I share, makes me want to mutiny against my brother’s tyranny. I won’t stand for it any longer, though I haven’t yet figured out how to revolt.
Enter OLIVER
OLIVER enters.
ADAM
Yonder comes my master, your brother.
ADAM
Here comes my master, your brother.
ORLANDO
Go apart, Adam, and thou shalt hear how he will shake me up.
ORLANDO
Go hide, Adam, and you’ll hear how he abuses me.

OLIVER
Now, sir, what make you here?
OLIVER
Hey, you! What are you making here?
ORLANDO
Nothing. I am not taught to make anything.
ORLANDO
Nothing. I’ve never been taught how to make anything.
OLIVER
What mar you then, sir?
OLIVER
Well, then, what are you messing up?
ORLANDO
Marry, sir, I am helping you to mar that which God made, a poor unworthy brother of yours, with idleness.
ORLANDO
I’m helping you mess up one of God’s creations—your poor, unworthy brother—by having him do nothing.

OLIVER
Marry, sir, be better employed, and be naught awhile.
OLIVER
Indeed, sir, find something better to do and get lost for a while.
ORLANDO
Shall I keep your hogs and eat husks with them? What prodigal portion have I spent that I should come to such penury?
ORLANDO
Should I tend your pigs and eat husks with them? When did I waste so much money that I ended up this poor?
OLIVER
Know you where you are, sir?
OLIVER
Do you know where you are, sir?

ORLANDO
O sir, very well: here in your orchard.
ORLANDO
Yes, sir, very well—I’m here in your orchard.
OLIVER
Know you before whom, sir?
OLIVER
Do you know whom you’re talking to?
ORLANDO
Ay, better than him I am before knows me. I know you are my eldest brother, and in the gentle condition of blood you should so know me. The courtesy of nations allows you my better, in that you are the first-born, but the same tradition takes not away my blood, were there twenty brothers betwixt us. I have as much of my father in me as you, albeit, I confess, your coming before me is nearer to his reverence.
ORLANDO
Yes, better than you know me. I know you’re my oldest brother, and deserve more respect. But we’re in the same family, so you should acknowledge that I am a gentleman too. According to custom, as the first-born you are my superior. But it’s not customary to treat me like I’m not even a gentleman, even if there were twenty brothers between you and me. I have as much of our father in me as you do, though I admit you’re closer to him and matter more because you’re older.

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